March 15, 2006, 00:30 PT: Well, it is one year less a day or so to when I took Die to the hospital for the last time. I've reflected repeatedly on my journal entries, and thought about how the first month changed me, and how the next 11 would be even more profound. I'll continue now, writing in my blog, after taking about an 11 month break.
Why did I stop writing after a month last year? I don't know. I guess those are the most important times, and maybe I didn't want to write about the further losses I faced, the good times and bad times to follow, making it through each and every holiday or important date, etc. I didn't want to write about the abandonement I went through with friends and family, the hurt people caused my kids (yes, I think of them as my kids, even if the older two aren't, biologically), and the pain of having to build a new life and new relationships.
God, I don't wish this on anybody. But, if you have to go through it, know you are not alone. ....Click to Page 14